So what should you keep for yourself? Below, experts believe, and when to be silent when it is appropriate to share.
1. Of your income
The first time your child asks you about how much of your income, you may be silent for a moment. Should you say? “It’s important to educate your child about the differences in the level of salaries and career choices that you can generate a higher income, but I am not sure that your child needs to know how much of your salary,” said Weitzberg.
Why you should keep quiet: First, it is pointless to give the information, said Weitzberg, plus, it all also depends on the age of your child, because any number that you mentioned, can make your child think that you are rich. “Before working, children often find it difficult to understand the amount of money in their head,” said Weitzberg.
“A thousand dollars was very big for them, so you can imagine how they think about money as much as 35 thousand or 100 thousand dollars,” he added. And, when kids think that their parents have the money to spend, they tend to ask for items that more (and more expensive).
What should you say: Instead of saying, “mom salary of (amount of money) every month,” or, “That’s none of your business,” Betsy Brown Braun, author of “Just Tell Me What to Say: Sensible Tips and Scripts for Perplexed Parents, “suggests the following response:” Salary mother enough to pay all the bills, pay for the car, and pay … ”
It gives your kids enough information to know whether you can afford to take care of and you do not need to worry, if your child disclose your financial information to their classmates. It is also a good opportunity to give the values as a family: Describe the things that you think you like best, such as health, eating home cooking and enjoying dinner together, and how the functions of money to pay for your child.
When telling the truth: There is no definite age to express how much you pay, it all depends on the maturity level of your child and their desire to know, said Weitzberg. Before sharing stories, ask yourself, “Why does he want to know? ‘” After you answer these questions, use your best judgment to decide whether a specific amount as the salary range or how you start a career and get to the position you like the most deserve to be told, “said Weitzberg.
2. How much debt you have
“Talk openly to your debt your child understand what the debt, but the amount of debt your family does not need to be explained,” said Ken Damato, founder and CEO DoughMain which is the site of family financial education. Debt one dollar can make children afraid, especially at a very young age, he added.
Why you should stay silent: Even if you do not give the actual amount, if your child heard you talk about how much student loan debt you are, how long you will pay off your mortgage or how much risk you will lose the house / car / whatever, it can make them feel insecure. Children need to feel safe, and parents will take care of them.
What should you say: Instead of talking about how much debt your family, Damato said it was better to teach children about debt in general, and ways to avoid or pay it off. “First, explain what was owed and how people are trapped into debt, such as credit cards are not paid off in full,” he said.
“Then, explain that if you are in debt, it’s important to try to pay it off right away, because there will be even greater as the interest accrued.”
When telling the truth: There will be no time for the parents to disclose the exact amount of their debt to their children, said Damato, except in urgent circumstances and it is important for the kids (because when it starts up, the kids will soon sustain parents’ financial need).
3. What did your family do not have
Yes, your child will be aware if your neighbor has a swimming pool while you do not, or when wearing shoes cousin super expensive and you do not have children, but there is no reason for you to show what your family has when compared to others.
Why you should keep quiet: If your family is lucky enough to be able to buy many luxuries, your child might think that the family is superior and start bragging. If your family is not of the upper class, he may feel embarrassed, or even angry at you, because you are not rich.
Regardless of whether your family is rich or not, the comparison makes the child feel it’s important to keep up with (or beat) the richer families. Children who memimliki such habits tend to have financial problems as adults, said Weitzberg.
What should you say: When your child starts asking why someone else has something that you do not have a family, you do not have to find excuses, or offended. “What should a parent say is, ‘every family has their own way of doing things,'” says Brown Braun. Then, you can explain: “We, as a family, do not choose to spend our money that way, we’d rather save the money for a walk, or do we prefer to use the money to buy special food for the family.”
Keeping a chat about your own household, can help children to focus more on what your friends are doing, and are not too concerned with what other people are doing.
When telling the truth: There is no need to compare your family with other families, it is enough to be thankful for what you have family.
4. What does investment
Parents with small children should hold such discussions. Understanding the investment can be confusing for some adults, as well as for children, it can be very difficult (or impossible) to understand.
Why you should keep quiet: If you start talking about stocks, bonds, and mutual funds, your child may be overwhelmed and think that dealing with it is very difficult (and boring).
What should you say: “When educating your children about finances, it is important to build financial knowledge within a few steps,” said Weitzberg. He suggested that parents start talking about what and how the money was obtained, and then move on to concepts such as saving and budgeting, and credit and debt, and has finally invest.
When telling the truth: We have stages of age when you have to teach your kids here, and we suggest an easy way to begin to introduce the concept of the stock market in adolescence around the age of 13 years.
5. Large losses
Despite the fact that there will always be ups and downs in your finances, experts said that the loss is too much (or larger) should not be told to children.
Why you should keep quiet: Remember, security and stability is essential for the welfare of children, so if your child hear that you lost $ 5,000 in the stock market, or your comment like, “Well, there is no tuition fee for you” after a loss. It can be something that is worrisome for children, said Damato.
What should you say: When you need to tighten spending after a loss, it is not necessary to warn your child to say how much you lose. A simple explanation is enough: “We’re trying to save a little more money today, making money on eating out and going to the movies will be reduced.”
When telling the truth: The best time for parents to warn their children that you suffered a huge financial loss when your child is of working age and it is very important to him, said Damato. “For example, if the child will have to take out college loans for family finances were deteriorating, it would be important to discuss the matter with him, and then talk about the next steps to be taken,” he explained.